So as we countdown to the end of our sweet sweet twenties, and dive head first into the “dirty thirties” we decided to create ourselves a little bit of a bucket list and also to share a bit of wisdom about what we’ve learnt and what we would tell our younger selves if we had the opportunity.
Dear Younger Me
You are no doubt sitting in your room relaxing and listening to Britney at a deafening volume, no matter how much mum tells you, “you’ll be deaf by the time you’re 30”, don’t listen, we aren’t deaf yet!
So we turn the big 3 0 this year, can you believe it? I remember thinking 21 was old! I wanted to write down some words of wisdom for you and reassure you that what you are doing is great, we are so happy with how things have turned out so far! Now don’t get me wrong I still don’t know everything, I don’t even know the half of it and I don’t think anyone ever really knows everything but I think if someone had told me all of this when I was your age it might have helped.
This first point is very cliché, but always be yourself, I know you try to please everyone and want everyone to like you but trust me as you get older you end up not really caring, except about those closest to you. Second chances, now I know we are very big on those, we still are as no one is perfect and people stuff up now and again, even us, surprise surprise, however, go with your gut! There are people we give second chances to that in the back of our mind we know we shouldn’t but we do it anyways, don’t bother, they let you down time and time again and are no longer in your life now anyways.
I know you don’t always like to listen to mum, you bicker like cats and dogs sometimes but really it’s because you are so alike it’s not funny, even though you would probably hate to hear that, It’s quite a compliment. You grow up to be, as mum would put it, tough, a person who isn’t afraid to say no or stick up for herself, her friends and family. Every once in a while you should listen to mum, she surprisingly knows what she’s talking about some of the time. Three key things she has taught us and that have stuck are:
- Always moisturise your face neck and hands, they show aging first and when you’re older you will be thankful that your hands don’t give away your age.
- You will have so many friends during your school years but as you get older you will be able to count your closest friends on one hand… this is so true even though you may not think that now, we have kept only 3-4 close friends and you really don’t need any more!
- “Be kind, but don’t be a pushover like me” just so you know, mum is no longer a pushover, we trained her in the art of saying no! To be a nice person you don’t have to bend over backwards for everyone.
Now comes the more personal, tough stuff. Please don’t spend months freaking out about if you should go to university or not. Uni isn’t for everyone and jumping straight into the workforce has turned out really well for us. Keep working hard and aiming for greatness, you don’t always need a degree to land a job you love and we don’t for a second regret our decision to not attend Uni.
Food is NOT your enemy!! Luckily we have mums metabolism so we can generally still eat whatever we like and not gain too much weight, but at 29 WE DON’T CARE!! EAT THE DAMN COOKIE!!!! We also now love running, I know who would have thought, but honestly I know that getting sick with glandular fever made you the skinniest you’ve ever been and it’s not like you starved yourself afterwards but you are going to start double thinking all those treats and food in general but please don’t, it’s not healthy and even though we don’t have issues to the degree some girls do, it’s still a problem that I wish you would kick a lot earlier. Trust me, there is no point to it and yes eventually we pull ourselves out of it but it really is just a waste of time, energy and delicious food!
Stop fake tanning!!!! You will look back at those photos and shudder. No one should be that brown… who are we kidding we were orange. Just stop!
The fun stuff, you are about to embark on your first overseas trip, and in typical Jane form you’re not doing it by halves, you’re moving to Canada for almost a year and it’s going to be the most amazing thing ever. This will kick-start your love of travel and you will do so much more before you turn 30. Have fun, enjoy it.. oh and pack your bloody camera charger… otherwise you’ll end up searching high and low for one and it ends up costing you a small bomb. Oh and GET TRAVEL INSURANCE!!!!! You will get appendicitis of all things and with no travel insurance you will spend almost $15k to not die. So please be smart.
Everyone knows you for being the “I will never have children” person, you still don’t have kids but are slowly coming around to the idea, we are still yet to see what the future holds so for now we continue with fur babies, but you and Ben treat Lupo like he actually is a human child so perhaps babies are on the horizon you never know.
We are not married, we are still with Ben so yes we are sick of hearing “when are you two finally getting engaged!?” it will happen when it happens but right now we are happy being happy.
To end this, I just want to say how proud I am of you, you’ve come along way and you aren’t afraid to go for all the things you want, you will start a blog and become a social media influencer (it’s sort of like bebo and facebook) with Emz and have so much fun doing it, you don’t live in the same country anymore but you do talk every single day.
Keep doing what you’re doing, we were always bound to make mistakes along the way but I am proud to say we actually do learn from them even though we can be super stubborn at times.
Love always and forever
29 (almost 30) year old Jane
My Bucket List for my 30’s was hard. Its not because I have done everything and been everywhere, I think its because I am happy with what I have at the moment. Key things I would love to have done in the next few years are:
- Travel more, there are so many places I still want to go
- Buy a house
- Marriage… this one is hard, I’ve been with the boy for 11 years now, we are so happy and I do feel like we basically are married now. People are always pressuring us to do something official, an amazing diamond ring wouldn’t go amiss but will see what the next few years bring, either way im happy.
- Finally go on mine and Emz girl getaway to New York, we’ve both been separately but this has been a dream of ours for years now
- Be genuinely happy, we all have good and bad days but I would like to look back in 5-10 years time and be proud of what I’ve done and really be happy.
Dear Younger Me,
It’s funny when I think back to where you are in your life right now, turning 30 was such a huge deal and so far away. Your biggest concern at present is probably wondering what outfit you’re going to wear out this weekend, or how you’re going to get your friends place on your learners licence without getting pulled over and fined.
So here we are, turning 30 in less than 8 months and although we’ve been in denial that this was ever going to happen, we’re starting to come around to the idea. I wish that I could go back in time to give you these words of wisdom myself, as lets be honest they would have helped out a lot along the way. (Even though the likelihood of you listening to me would be highly unlikely). But as we know everything happens for a reason- the good, the bad and the ugly and without all of them we wouldn’t be who we are today.
I know that you have such a well thought out plan about what you’re going to do in your life, you’ve had this same plan in your mind for years now. But unfortunately life changes in the blink of an eye and your set in stone ideas don’t always go to plan. Don’t beat yourself up about it, that’s just life and trust me I’m now thankful your crazy plans didn’t go ahead! Life is full of surprises, even when you think that you know it all and have everything planned out.
You are going to be challenged to push through things that you never thought possible. There will be days where you physically don’t think that you can keep going – but trust me you are SO much stronger than you realise. Reach out and communicate with people- family or friends. I know that you don’t like to let people in, you don’t want to be that weak person, but there are so many thoughts running around your head and if you don’t let them out you’re going to explode and that’s not good for you mentally or physically. Also stop over analyzing everything, it’s going to drive you nutty.
The most important thing to remember is to just be yourself. I know that you feel like you need to have all of these friends and you need to have all of these things to make people like you, but in the long run that is so not important. Friendship should be equal, but if you’re the one that’s constantly trying to impress people, it’s never going to work out. As Nana told us time and time again, if you get to the end of your life and you can count your GOOD friends on one hand then you’re lucky. Well we’re not at the end of our lives yet, however we have a new appreciation for that saying. You are going to make new friends and you will lose old friends- some regrettably and some…..well let’s just say you’re better off without. Also, don’t judge people so quickly- that nerdy girl who you internally rolled your eyes at on your first encounter, might one day end up being your best friend! (Sorry Jane haha)
Speaking of family, be good to them. The time that you have with them is so precious and as you grow older you will be so grateful for how much they have truly done for you. You will lose two (touch wood no more just yet) important people in your life and I’m not going to lie, the feeling of sadness and the “I wish I had…..” does get easier, but never truly goes away. I know that you have your teenage sulky fights with your Mum- because you’re always right!!! But I hate to tell you this, 99.9% of the time she is right, unfortunately she knows you better then you know yourself. (Damn it I hear you say.) You should also listen to your Mum when she tells you that all that junk food will catch up on you….. IT DOES!!! (Haha sorry Mum)
Now lets talk about that hair…….there’s this magical thing called toner…… it’s this amazing shampoo type product that will make your hair a beautiful shade of blonde rather than a horrific shade of yellow. Use it!!
You will have your heart broken and you will break hearts, but at the end of all the mess you will find your Prince. Being married hasn’t changed much, but you do get to have a gorgeous ring and call your best friend your husband!
Much to your horror (and our Mothers), we don’t have any children and haven’t got any plans to do so just yet. When you reach that ripe old age of 26 (the age you planned to have children), you quickly realise that there is so much more that you want and need to do before having them.
In a nutshell you will laugh, you’ll cry, you’ll feel like some day’s you just can’t go on….but at the end of the day it will all work out fine. I mean come on, I bet you never would’ve thought that you’d be sitting here writing a blog post, with your Bestie Jane, about turning 30 huh.
You have made it on the countdown to 30 and although I can’t see the future, I have a feeling it’s only about to get better.
Lots of love always,
The older and wiser Emma
P.S- Lay off the Chi Chi- nobody needs to be that tanned!!!
Here’s my bucket list of things I’d like to achieve in the next few years.
- Get my full drivers licence- (I have been putting this off for far to long)
- Have a healthier lifestyle and stick to an exercise plan.
- Finally travel with Jane- New York sounds amazing!
- Finish renovating my house.
- Have a family- Don’t go crazy Mum, it’s still a few years away.